Mindful Vigilance: Protecting Your Inner Space.
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By Omolola Olakunri.
There’s a fluttering in my heart that I need to calm. A quiet apprehension that has silently crept into spaces that it has no right to. Usually, I pride myself on my ability to guard my heart from external manipulations. Creating a force shield that no ideologue could splinter..
I fight, defend, and protect my heart because out of it flow the issues of life.
I’ve been a warrior since forever, having learnt early that life is a personal battle. One fights to win..
Self-preservation is therefore a must. It has taught me to always set the template of who I am, vis-à-vis my culture and experiences, not a reinvention of random posts that seek to rupture my carefully planned life.
This slow insidious enemy slid in without a fight. Without me even being aware. Like the slow erosion of the waves as they crash into rocks, like dust settling slowly on a painting. It eased itself in, taking up space. It was when it started digging in roots, affecting my thinking, trying to change long-established routines and habits that I realised that there was a stranger in the house.
So, today is eviction day. I am taking no prisoners and on very high alert.
The first post slid into my phone at the crack of dawn. Thinking it was business as usual, ready to take up space in my phone and in my heart that it had not earned or deserved. I read the headline, smiled, and immediately deleted the story.
I did not pause, I did not hesitate. Out it went.
The three monkeys, See no evil, Hear no evil, and Speak no evil had been activated. House cleaning had begun. Today’s post was titled ‘7 meals not to eat at over 50.’ I snorted.
A couple of days ago, there was a post on sleeping posture for those 50 and above, and before that, there was what fruits not to eat. Then last month, there were posts on clothes that flattered senior citizens. Hairstyles that knock years off age. How to reverse ageing. How to drink Water. How to do this and how not to do that.
Pray, what did the generation of 50 and above do wrong? I don’t think that there is any other age bracket that has been so poked, analysed, and dismembered like the 50 and above.
Everyone has an opinion on how we should live our lives, even the millennials and Gen Zs.!!!
Why are we the topic of so much interest?
If we are not being advised to move our bedrooms downstairs because many cannot climb the stairs anymore, we should start wearing flat sandals, because heels can twist the ankles. The Body Mass Index (BMI) of the average Caucasian is used to measure the bigger boned and fuller hipped Black. And still, we are told we have to lose weight? Seriously??
Posts on the phone, by unwanted advisors, who think they know us more than we know ourselves. Subtle influences that seek to shift our lifestyle and perspectives. A kind of subtle mind control. Many of them are purely content creators, but they are wreaking havoc in the hearts of so many.
If it was the larger society that tried to control us by legislation, we would be up in arms, but these posts do not seek our permission. They just sneak in and get under our skin.
Our guard is down because we don’t expect the enemy to attack us so subtly. We expect attacks to be huge and noisy. But does the adage not say that the enemy we look for lives in our homes with us?
I had unknowingly allowed these posts to take up residence, but things came to a head for me when I got the one that advised that those over 50 should not be eating pounded yam because of the high cholesterol intake. Interestingly, on the particular day the post came in, I was being feted to a feast with an extraordinary ensemble by my in-laws. Guess what was the star attraction? Yes. Pounded yam. They knew I loved it, and had gone out of their way …
Our parents did not have social media, they lived in blissful ignorance. Did not fear ageing. Listened instead to their inner clocks and followed body rhythms.
They did not panic at the first strands of grey, nor cover fine wrinkles with tonnes of concealer.
They did not have to be told what was good for them, nor fear ageing or becoming Senior citizens. They embraced it.
It was proof of the many seasons of life they had lived and been actively present in. They looked like parents. Not the gargoyles we see all over town..
They would drink water, take long walks in the neighbourhood, enjoying the colors of riotous bougainvillea, the smell of fruit trees, and the kind greetings of the people as they passed each other. They embraced life..
We are being short-circuited in every direction, told what to do as if we are morons.. Stereotyped and profiled. Making many feel guilty for the little pleasures of life, like hiding a bar of chocolate from prying eyes because some end-of-knowledge person said it contains too much sugar. Or that dressing now has to be age-appropriate.
Says who?
Definitely not the free spirit of some that love to challenge the establishment and live on their own terms. I know several who still wear elegant heels and would not be seen dead in sandals. I have come across those who still climb their staircases, sport a hair bob, wear mini skirts, go mountain climbing and kayaking, and are deliciously irreverent in their lifestyle. They are making the most of their lives!!
I am aware that social media is a double-edged sword. It comes with illumination and enlightenment, but it must never have the power to rob us of our essence. Who are we then without it?
In this age of information overload, being mindful of what we allow in our space is crucial.
We must be vigilant about the subtle influences that seek to shape our thoughts and actions, especially those coming from faceless sources.
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